Observation #3: Sometimes I like to pretend I have control when I just don't. There are various things in life over which I have no control. Some of them are personal, some are not. Some of them carry little or no emotional weight for me, some carry a lot. Unfortunately, the things that are more personal to me have the potential to be the most heartbreaking when they don't go the way I want them to go.
I'm at that point in my heart-brokenness, where I could choose to receive help from the Lord to trust Him and move on in hope, or I could just harden my heart and be cynical and bitter. I want to know that "His grace is sufficient", but it seems that I can't even do that for myself. Hardening my heart feels easier and less painful, yet I know it is a miserable state.
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